I cried a little bit when I read this.

Sometimes we need reminders about how much our impact helps the people around us.

Early this fall, as I was contemplating offering I AM Alchemy again in 2024, I had a moment of doubt.

I took 2023 off from teaching I AM Alchemy so I could focus more deeply on my Shamanic practice and lineage, and the extra time and attention I had led to creating the Sacred Ecology course, supporting clients more deeply in their Shamanic practice, and developing my work with sacred plant medicines. It's been wonderful.

But because I've been away from I AM Alchemy since my last apprentice graduated in March earlier this year, I forgot how amazing this course is.

"Does this course actually help people?"

"A year-long apprenticeship course is a huge investment of time, energy and money, for me and my students. Is it worth it?"

"My Shamanic practice is going so well. Should I just focus on that and back off of Alchemy?"

These questions and doubts were floating around in my mind when my recent apprentice graduate emailed me the most wonderful and articulate review of her experience in this course.

Y'all, I cried a little bit when I read it.

Reading more about how her experience in this year-long apprenticeship impacted her in enormously positive ways reminded me that...

YES, I AM Alchemy definitely helps people, and the benefits extend far beyond the year-long course.

YES, I AM Alchemy is a significant investment of time, energy and money, and it is totally worth it.

YES, my Shamanic practice is more thriving than ever, and it coexists and harmonizes beautifully with Alchemy.

Read on and see for yourself what she had to say about I AM Alchemy:

"My name is Nicky Smolter. I am a teacher, community leader, and magical person.

I worked with Michelle in I AM Alchemy and one on one mentorship [prior to I AM Alchemy].

I joined I AM Alchemy because I had been on a spiritual and magical journey for several years, but I desired something deeper to truly integrate all that I was learning. I knew I was in a transition stage but didn't quite know who or what I was transitioning into. I knew I needed something with structure that was not just about completing modules or participating in calls, but something that I was able to immerse myself in while still living my day to day life.

The I AM Alchemy course was not just a way to deepen my own magical mastery through all of the different teachings, tools, and practices, but it was a container for deep transformation. I am a different person than I was before working with Michelle and doing this program, but at the same time, I am more fully myself than ever before. This container was really what held me and supported me through the death of the old and rebirth into the new.

Through I AM Alchemy, I have learned so much about how creation, transformation, and magic works on both a practical and spiritual level. This course helped me to incorporate all of the different teachings and modalities that I've learned before into a strong foundation that I can continue to use over and over again. My life is so much more magical and expansive. I feel like I've upleveled into a new version of power, creation, mastery, and connection. I have also deepened my trust in spirit and magic that has made the hard parts of life so much easier and the best parts of life more joyful.

One of my biggest takeaways is trusting when I feel called and leaning into the unknown. I felt called to do this program but I didn't always understand why. I'm not a practitioner or healer so I wasn't sure that I needed to invest in my own spiritual, personal, and magical growth in this way. However, I am so grateful that I gave myself this opportunity because it has led me to live in a way that I had always dreamed of. Mixing magic and spirituality into a very practical 3D life. I don't feel like I need to choose between the two, but instead can weave them together to create a life that feels both personally fulfilling and deeply impactful.

Because of this course, I will continue to trust and lean into this work. Even if it's not what I get paid to do, its effect on my life and those I work and interact with is remarkable. I see and feel the value of committing to my own spiritual and magical path to create a life I love.

Michelle’s support and this container helped me to step into my own power. I really feel like I spiritually and magically grew up during my time working with her.

I recommend I AM Alchemy to anyone who feels called, especially those who have taken many courses and programs but still feel like they're not fully integrating. For me, this was like the graduate study in practical magic that helped pull everything together and allowed me to lead my own transformation.

I was actually a little nervous when I first started working one on one with Michelle because I knew that choosing her as a teacher and guide would push me outside of my comfort zone and challenge me to go deeper and step into my own magical power at a completely different level. Michelle is truly someone who walks the walk, and the depth of her knowledge, practice, and embodiment was something that I wanted for my own life. I felt incredibly supported, encouraged, and challenged throughout our work together.

[Shared verbatim in a personal phone call] I feel like that last year of investing time and energy and money will be paying off dividends for decades to come."

If any of that resonates with you, now is the time to submit your application for I AM Alchemy.

Do you desire the peace, confidence and expansion that come from deep self-mastery?

Are you guided by universal forces to master spiritual technology based in Universal Law?

Are you ready to offer actual magic for the purpose of healing, illumination and actualization, for yourself and for all beings?

I AM Alchemy is a year-long course in practical transformation for your spiritual journey, and it begins March 2024. Check out all the course details here.

Early Bird ends TODAY.

Are you ready to apply for the course and claim your Early Bird discount?

$200 off Student Path!

$400 off Apprentice Path!

(If you're not sure which option is right for you, I will help you decide during our consultation.)

Here's how to lock in your spot for I AM Alchemy Early Bird:

1. Submit your application for I AM Alchemy.

2. Book a consultation with me.

3. Pay your deposit to hold your spot.

What is Alchemy? (And what is it not?)

The word “Alchemy” gets thrown around a lot these days. When people hear “Alchemy,” their association usually goes in one of two directions. They might think of medieval wizards stirring cauldrons, trying to turn lead into gold, or they might think of a nebulous, new-age concept of intangible transformation through the blending of opposites.

While there is a little bit of truth in both of these, neither idea really captures the essence of Alchemy and why it is vitally important to you, here, now, in this modern age.

Let’s break down some of the common misconceptions.

Alchemy is NOT a synonym or metaphor for transformation. Lots of mindful/intentional/slightly spiritual flavored personal development offerings are using the word “Alchemy” to describe the transformation of their clients, and while their clients may have awesome benefits from that work, it’s not actually Alchemy. Alchemy IS an ancient body of knowledge with specific teachings, practices and initiations that come from spiritual technology based in Universal Law. Alchemy IS a rich lineage of unique energetic and physical principles that encompass both spiritual and practical transformation.

Alchemy is NOT stirring a cauldron, turning lead into gold. While the quest to turn lead into gold is a very literal interpretation of one aspect of Alchemical philosophy, there are infinite applications of Alchemical wisdom. Alchemy IS the practice of applying specific spiritual technologies to a situation or person in order to transmute the base aspects into a higher form of radiant actualization. Some Alchemists do this with metals. Some work with plants. Some work with the physical body and movement practices.

Alchemy is NOT coaching, mindset, Law of Attraction or energy healing. While these modalities have their own power and tremendous benefits, they are not Alchemy. Alchemy IS actual magic performed through the principles of energetic resonance, layering of like frequencies and active relationship between Above (Spirit) and Below (Earthly) planes of existence.

Alchemy is NOT personal development or the creative process. It is NOT an abstract idea of transformation. Alchemy IS the study of the Great Mystery to learn the principles of Universal Law, and the application of those principles through specific rituals, practices, initiations and techniques for the purpose of healing, illumination and actualization.

Alchemy is NOT a buzzword. It is NOT something you can learn by reading a book. Alchemy IS the origin of all modern medicine and science. Alchemy IS a major influence/contributor to other mystical bodies of knowledge such as Taoism, Kabbalah, Hermeticism, Tarot, Egyptian mysticism, Christian mysticism, and many more.

Alchemy IS a body of knowledge for which many people were persecuted and silenced.

Alchemy IS a tradition that had to go underground in order to survive.

Alchemy IS a mystery school that self-selects those who are meant to steward these wisdoms forward.

Are you called to be a student of the Great Mystery?

Are you guided by universal forces to master spiritual technology based in Universal Law?

Are you ready to offer actual magic for the purpose of healing, illumination and actualization, for yourself and for all beings?

I AM Alchemy begins March 2024.

As one course graduate shared:

"Through I AM Alchemy, I have learned so much about how creation, transformation, and magic works on both a practical and spiritual level. This course helped me to incorporate all of the different teachings and modalities that I've learned before into a strong foundation that I can continue to use over and over again. My life is so much more magical and expansive. I feel like I've upleveled into a new version of power, creation, mastery, and connection. I have also deepened my trust in spirit and magic that has made the hard parts of life so much easier and the best parts of life more joyful."

I AM Alchemy is a year-long course in practical transformation for your spiritual journey. Check out all the course details here.

Early Bird ends December 22. Are you ready to apply for the course and claim your Early Bird discount?

$200 off Student Path!

$400 off Apprentice Path!

(If you're not sure which option is right for you, I will help you decide during our consultation.)

Here's how to lock in your spot for I AM Alchemy Early Bird:

1. Submit your application for I AM Alchemy.

2. Book a consultation with me.

3. Pay your deposit to hold your spot.

I AM Alchemy:

Study the Mystery

Practice Transformation

Actualize your Radiance

Study the Mystery. Practice Transformation. Actualize Your Radiance.

Study the Mystery.

Practice Transformation.

Actualize Your Radiance.

This is more than the I AM Alchemy course tagline. This is the foundation of how we engage with the mystery school of Alchemy, but what does it mean?

It’s the 3-step recipe for how to effectively create healing and growth.

1. Study the Mystery

The keys to healing, radiant aliveness, right relation and well-being are woven into the fabric of creation all around us. Life itself is encoded with the truth of Universal Law. Everything on Earth flows with the Cycles of Power and energetic dynamics. By devoting ourselves to studying the Great Mystery, we open to learning these laws and codes. The cure for every ail already exists—we start by simply assessing what the ailment is, and that will indicate the appropriate actions to bring it into balance.

Alchemy is a diagnostic practice, which means that it will help you confidently assess the challenge or ail. Based on our studies of Universal Law and the Great Mystery, we form a diagnostic assessment. This may include:

• Which stage of Alchemy the person is in

• Which level(s) need the most support for transformation

• Which aspects of Self/archetypes of the Inner Constellation are needing the most support, and which parts of Self are driving the process

• Which planetary or universal energies would be most supportive to cultivate at that time

Example: let’s imagine a person who has gone through a challenging loss, such as ending a relationship. They have divided up their shared assets, moved out of their home, and lost connection with some mutual friends and community. This person is feeling grief, loneliness, disorientation and pain.

By studying the mystery and using our diagnostic tools, we could assess that this person is in the Dissolution stage of Alchemy, which is characterized as “Death of energetic and emotional structures.” The loss of the physical structures already happened in the previous stage: closing a relationship, moving out of the home, losing friends. Now the etheric architecture of those structures is dissolving away from this person’s life. The energies of this stage are all about mourning the loss, returning to the Void, surrender and reconnecting with the potential of creation.

Our diagnostic assessment of this person may look something like this:

• Stage of Alchemy: Dissolution

• Levels of support: All levels

• Archetypes at work: Calling upon Inner Nurturer to support Self through the process, healing Inner Warrior from feeling defensive and Inner Sovereign from fear of (not) being seen and loved

• Universal energies: Cycles of change, Grief work, Clearing stagnation and emotion

From this diagnostic assessment, we form our recommendations.

2. Practice Transformation

This is where we take inspired action and create transformation. Alchemy is a prescriptive practice, which means that based on the diagnostic assessment, we can apply specific practices and spiritual technology that work directly with the energies at play in order to create change.

Alchemical practices and spiritual technology are specific to the stages of Alchemy, the levels of energetic density, the Inner Archetypes and Universal energies.

To support the person in our example above, an Alchemist may prescribe the following:

• Dissolution practices for all levels (Cibation meditation, yin yoga, sacred water offerings, sacred water collection and consecration, ritual baths, intuitive movement, journaling and writing unsent letters).

• Inner Nurturer, Warrior and Sovereign practices (addressing nutrition, rest posture, Shamanic journey practice, soul retrieval, Inner Child work, solar plexus activation, heart opening practices).

• Lunar rituals to work with the cycles of transformation, Lung channel qigong to purge grief, and tapping practices to clear organs, glands and release trapped emotion.

The “Practice Transformation” part of this 3-step recipe is where we have power to actively apply tools and techniques in order to bring about change. Transformation is a process, but in this case, it is also a specific skill set that operates based on logical and consistent truths of Universal Law.

3. Actualize Your Radiance

This is the inevitable outcome of moving through the cycle of Alchemy and effectively applying practices of transformation according to our studies of the Great Mystery. Life is encoded with all of the keys to healing, radiant aliveness, right relation and well-being. All of creation seeks to thrive, and when we live our lives according to the truth of Universal Law, we work with the unseen forces all around us that support our thriving.

A successful outcome for our example person above might look like:

• They move from the Dissolution Stage to the Separation Stage and work with principles of Purification.

• Their Inner Nurturer is balanced and nourished, their Inner Warrior is peaceful, and their Inner Sovereign is shining their light and feeling worthy of love and attention from Self and others.

• They are working in collaboration with Universal cycles of change (rather than feeling tossed around by them), Lung qi is healthy with Courage and Integrity, organ function and emotional body is clear and relaxed.

When we devote ourselves as students of the Great Mystery, we learn the keys to healing and radiant aliveness.

When we know the keys to healing and radiant aliveness, we can apply specific tools and spiritual technology for transformation.

When we apply specific tools for transformation, we actualize our most thriving, radiant selves.

Do you crave the healing, transformation and growth that comes with Alchemy?

Are you ready to Study the Mystery, Practice Transformation and Actualize Your Radiance?

I AM Alchemy begins March 2024.

As one course graduate shared:

"I joined I AM Alchemy because I had been on a spiritual and magical journey for several years, but I desired something deeper to truly integrate all that I was learning... The I AM Alchemy course was not just a way to deepen my own magical mastery through all of the different teachings, tools, and practices, but it was a container for deep transformation. I am a different person than I was before working with Michelle and doing this program, but at the same time, I am more fully myself than ever before. This container was really what held me and supported me through the death of the old and rebirth into the new... Michelle’s support and this container helped me to step into my own power. I really feel like I spiritually and magically grew up during my time working with her."

I AM Alchemy is the year-long apprenticeship that will teach you practical transformation for your spiritual journey. Check out all the course details here.

Early Bird ends December 22. Are you ready to apply for the course and claim your Early Bird discount?

$200 off Student Path!

$400 off Apprentice Path!

(If you're not sure which option is right for you, I will help you decide during our consultation.)

Here's how to lock in your spot for I AM Alchemy Early Bird:

1. Submit your application for I AM Alchemy.

2. Book a consultation with me.

3. Pay your deposit to hold your spot.

I AM Alchemy: The Mystery School of Science and Spiritual Practice

Okay, y’all. Time for a vulnerable share.

I AM Alchemy represents something quite phenomenal, and deeply personal. What now exists as a year-long intensive training course in practical magic began as me following my intuitive guidance to work with the natural energies of transformation.

From the time I was very young, this way of looking at the world has simply made the most sense to me. When I first began officially studying and practicing Shamanism in 2003, my natural inclinations were confirmed by an Earth-based way of knowing that is older than recorded history itself.

I was always interested in healing, science, magic, personal inquiry and the miracle of nature, and I discovered while I was in high school that these concepts had a very natural intersection. I continued my education and investigation. While earning my undergraduate degree in Animal Physiology and Behavior, I simultaneously completed Master Healer training and furthered my Shamanic studies. I walked the paths of magic and of science at the same time, and discovered that they ultimately led to the same place: back to that same worldview that I’d had as a child, but with all the benefits of the added wisdom of life experience.

I AM Alchemy is simply a synthesis of this world view. That which I took for granted as a child (the sacredness of life itself, the magic that exists in all beings, the power and utter majesty of the Earth) now takes on new significance through the lens of where the path has taken me through the study of life. As I grew beyond my young innocence, I learned that not everyone experiences the world in this way… but that people are hungry for it again, and the time has come for us to reclaim this Sacred Work.

This course is a revolution not only in the body of knowledge itself, but also in the way that we relate to knowledge. Science and Spiritual practice have more in common than we might think: both are means of discovering Truth, both emphasize inquiry and research, both honor the contributions of our ancestors (physical, energetic and intellectual) and both, in their purest form, serve to uplift, empower and inspire all beings.

These two paths of Science and Spirituality were once a unified journey. The investigation of life took place just as much within the heart as within the lab. Modern chemistry, medicine and principles of physics were born from the research of spiritual practitioners as they sought to identify God in the world around them. Throughout history, Alchemists are noted not only for their philosophical and spiritual work, but their contributions to the scientific community. Alchemy is one of the few practices (if not the only one) that has maintained a foot in both worlds.

However, these paths drifted apart, and the worlds of Science and Spirit grew to vilify each other. History is riddled with examples of the scientific community looking upon spiritual practitioners with disdain, and just as many examples of the spiritual community rejecting the findings of science. The path of science shifted in the Yang direction of logic, linear thinking, reason and structure, and spiritual practice as a whole moved in the Yin direction of fluidity, passivity and suppression in the outer world. The spiritual collective had lost its structure, and science had lost its soul.

We are at a turning point in the evolution of the planet where we have the opportunity to bring these fields once more into collaboration and support of each other. I firmly believe, having walked both paths, that this is one of the fundamental pieces necessary in order for us to live a life of fully empowered creatorship. In order to truly actualize the world of our hearts and dreams, our relationship to knowing must include both the evidence-based experience, and the power of faith.

The time for knowledge that exists only in the thinking, rational state is over. Now is the time of feeling, embodied wisdom and subtle perception.

The time for retreating into an oblivious bliss state and separating from the physical realm is over. Now is the time of sovereignty, discernment and returning magic to the workings of Earth.

I AM Alchemy operates as an apprenticeship in practical magic through the paths of both Science and Spirituality. Throughout this course, we’ll be using the principles of scientific inquiry: asking really good questions, tracking data (lots of journaling and opportunities to reflect on trends), moving along a trajectory of investigation and grounding our results into our lived experience. We’ll also be working with principles of spiritual practice: honoring the immediacy and multifaceted nature of Truth, taking time for reverence and pure connection, inviting Spirit into our lives and living in alignment with the sacredness all around us.

My greatest wish for this work is that it serves to help usher in a new way of being on this planet—one that honors the sacredness of life and also gives us a road map for how to live in this world.

May this work support your own journey of sacred unfolding as you come home to yourself.

May this work support the freedom, sovereignty and health of all beings on Earth.

We do this work for the benefit of ourselves, of all those around us, of all beings on Earth and of the Earth, Herself.

Does this worldview of science and spiritual practice resonate with you?

Are you ready to take your place as a student of the Great Mystery?

Are you ready to apply for the course and claim your Early Bird discount?

$200 off Student Path!

$400 off Apprentice Path!

(If you're not sure which option is right for you, I will help you decide during our consultation.)

Here's how to lock in your spot for I AM Alchemy Early Bird:

1. Submit your application for I AM Alchemy.

2. Book a consultation with me.

3. Pay your deposit to hold your spot.

Are you excited?? I'm excited!!

I AM Alchemy:

Study the Mystery

Practice Transformation

Actualize your Radiance

Why you probably don't have an entity (and no one is attacking you)

I have learned to never be surprised by the shit people tell me, or by people contacting me out of the blue with some truly wild stories. Seriously—my email is a fascinating read. I regularly receive messages from random people that range from two sentences to a few pages long, and most of these emails include the person’s assumption that they have picked up a harmful entity, and/or someone or something is attacking them. Occasionally, people request an exorcism.

My response to these people varies, depending on the level of wackadoo in the email. I will usually offer support in the form of resources and practices to ground and strengthen the field. (I tell them, “go watch this podcast episode, do these practices for a week and then let me know how you’re doing.”) If the person seems relatively grounded and stable, I may invite them to do some sessions with me.

Interestingly, the people that I give practices to never circle back around with me. Seriously. Not once. This astonishes me, because in my mind, if I thought I had an entity and a Shaman told me to do something to support my system, I would do exactly what they told me.

Of the people I have worked with who came in thinking they had entities, attachments or were being attacked by someone or something, care to guess how many actually did?

Answer: a small handful.

In other words, over the 15+ years that I’ve been studying and practicing Shamanism and healing work, the percentage of people who think they have an entity or are being attacked, who ACTUALLY have an entity or are being attacked, is tiny. Like, maybe 5%.

So, what’s going on with the other 95%?

Without fail, the other 95% of people do not actually have entities or attachments, and are not being attacked by anyone or anything. Instead, they are feeling their own Shadow, and ascribing their discomfort to something outside of themselves.

Here are a few notable examples:

1. Several years ago, a woman contacted me about getting an exorcism for her 8-year-old granddaughter. She described the situation and I tuned into the field. Did the granddaughter have an entity? Answer: no. She was just being an 8-year-old and processing a lot of trauma in the only way she knew how—by screaming, acting out and going from zero to tantrum at the drop of a hat. I offered healing work (not an exorcism) and the woman said no. I believe she went on to have her granddaughter exorcised by a priest. (Cringe.)

2. Last year, a client came to me who thought he had entities that were making him tired and depressed. Did he? Answer: no. He was processing his own Shadow and metabolizing energy on behalf of his lineage. We did some very powerful healing sessions that released ancestral trauma, rewrote some unhealthy soul contracts and supported him in stepping into his empowered soul work and purpose.

3. Recently, my ex asked me if I was “sending her bad juju.” When I asked for clarification, she said she felt a lot of bad energy coming from me and was physically afraid for her safety. She thought I was attacking her. Was I? Answer: of course not. The fact that she thought I would further illustrated the wisdom of that separation. What was actually happening? She was most likely processing her Shadow and pain body magnified by our breakup.

4. A while ago, a woman reached out about her son. She was concerned for his health, and thought that he might have an entity or attachment. It turns out that the boy’s father had died in a bad way and that the boy had been the one to find him. Did he have an attachment? Answer: in this case, yes. The father’s spirit had attached to the boy.

These are only a few examples, but my god, people! The level of story-making blows my mind. Why do people so quickly jump to the conclusion that they have an entity, or that someone or something is attacking them? How did this become a thing?

I have a few thoughts on this:

1. Generally speaking, most people don’t understand the principle of Shadow or Shadow Work. For our purposes in Shamanic and Alchemical philosophy, the Shadow is “that which is unseen or unintegrated.” If people are confronted with their Shadow, it’s probably something they’ve been avoiding and it makes them uncomfortable.

2. If people aren’t used to being uncomfortable, they will try to explain their discomfort by assuming something is wrong, rather than “I’m processing trauma” or “I feel really bad about my decisions” or “I’m learning some really hard lessons right now,” and letting that be okay.

3. Projecting the discomfort to an external source means that people don’t have to take responsibility for it. If they’re not ready to own the energy and actually move through it, it’s a lot easier to blame their off-ness on an entity or an attack.

4. If people think there is an external source to blame, it means they get to be a victim, and they don’t actually have to change themselves or their behavior. Instead of looking at how they are creating or contributing to this experience, people think that the problem to be fixed is simply getting rid of the entity or stopping the attack.

5. Pop culture has glorified and misrepresented possession, entities, psychic attacks and all sorts of other bullshit. Yes, all of these things do exist. Yes, it is possible to be possessed, to have an entity or attachment, and energetic attack is totally a thing. However, it is not the most LIKELY explanation. Far more likely is the Shadow Work explanation. Occam’s razor, people: the simplest solution is probably the correct one.

The next time you’re moving through some uncomfortable energy and wondering if you have an entity or are being attacked… stop. It’s probably just your own Shadow. Here’s what to do:

1. Regulate your energy. Use energetic and physical practices to clear, ground, cultivate and protect your field. If you don’t know any of these techniques, tune in to my podcast, Shaman Sister Sessions. Katherine Bird and I offer lots of tools and practices.

2. Once you’ve regulated your field, assess how you’re doing. Ask yourself some guiding questions to learn more about your experience. Examples include:

   • What energy is moving through me?

   • What part of me is asking to be seen?

   • What am I getting out of this experience?

   • What part of me is asking to change or transform?

3. If you still need help, contact me! Yes, I know how to do exorcisms, but you probably don’t need one. Instead, we would most likely work on supporting your field, metabolizing unprocessed energy, healing trauma, actualizing your purpose and bringing you into your fullest, most empowered expression in the world. Isn’t that more fun than an exorcism?

When these people who contact me choose to show up and work with the Shadow, the results are incredibly powerful. Imagine consciously and lovingly working with the unseen and unintegrated parts of yourself to bring them into a harmonious state. Wouldn’t you love to give yourself that gift? Instead of keeping it surface level and assuming that someone or something else is to blame for your experience, imagine taking empowered agency for your process and transmuting your own Shadow.

Special sneak peek: new Shaman Sister Sessions episode comes out on Thursday! Episodes #92 and #93 are both about Entities, Attachments and Psychic Attacks. Episode #92 continues this conversation about why you probably don’t have an entity. Episode #93 talks about what to do if you do have an energetic attachment. Want access to the episodes? Join Lightworker Portal—the FREE community I created just for you! Get instant access to all the content archives.

Whether you have an entity or not (let’s face it: probably not) the opportunity for you is the same: to transmute your Shadow, to master your energy and to embody your fully empowered sovereignty. Regardless of how you choose to learn this lesson, your own Soul is inviting you to be more powerful and compassionate, and live with more grace than ever before.

This is true Alchemy.

If you find yourself in a situation like this, it's because your Soul is giving you the keys to your own actualization. Even though the energy may feel dense, heavy, insurmountable and incredibly painful, it is this same energy that will liberate you. This is your own personal lead--the heavy base metal that you get to transform into Gold. Your Soul is calling you to step up and alchemize your Shadow into your greatest Light. Your Soul is asking you to alchemize your pain into joy. Your Soul is inviting you to alchemize your grief, your anger, your suffering into grace, compassion and peace.

If you’re ready to say YES to your Soul, I’m here to help.

Do you want to…

• …go from feeling like you’re living at the whims of change, to intentionally choosing your own path of transformation and creation?

• …have a roadmap to guide you through the hardest transformational moments of your life?

• …learn tools and practices that will immediately and noticeably enhance your vitality, health, energy and well-being?

• …know without a shadow of a doubt that you are living your life “on purpose?”

• …feel connected to something bigger than yourself? Do you want to commune with Spirit through this ancient and powerful lineage?

• …use these powerful tools to support loved ones, clients and your community in their journey of transformation and actualization?

Applications are now open for Embody-Wild that will help you heal your Shadow.



Check out all the details here.

Many Blessings,

Practice prompt:

Get comfortable sitting with your Shadow body. Rather than dismissing or avoiding it, practice asking questions like:

• What energy is moving through me?

• What part of me is asking to be seen?

• What am I getting out of this experience?

• What part of me is asking to change or transform?

Part of me was afraid to go to Avalon, and now I know why (plus pictures!)

I returned 90 days ago from a priestess pilgrimage to Avalon. Since then, in addition to massive growth and activation, my life has been completely upended in a few key areas. For these past three months, I’ve been sitting with rage, grief, betrayal, catharsis, purification, power and resilience.

…which is exactly what I was afraid of.

My first morning in Avalon--I awoke before sunrise with a sense of urgency to go up the Tor (the hill). I practically ran to the top and did qi gong as the sun rose orange and burned off the surrounding mist.

In case you’re not familiar with Avalon, it’s an ancient and sacred site in England, most well known in mythology relating to King Arthur and the Lady of the Lake. The Isle of Avalon corresponds to the contemporary town of Glastonbury, where there are many cherished sacred sites. I had been feeling the Soul Calling to travel to Avalon for well over a year. The circumstances of my trip were about as divinely aligned as one could imagine, and for months preceding my trip, I felt the energy building with power and possibility.

And yet, along with that sense of power and potential came fear. As I journaled in preparation for the pilgrimage, I found myself expressing trepidation and anxiety. The fear I felt wasn’t attached to any particular concern—I knew from my meditations and my guidance that this pilgrimage was part of a series of powerful initiations, and that I would receive incredible activations as part of my journey. But along with the knowledge of the activations that awaited me, a very human survival-level fear lurked in the background.

It’s a lot easier for me to look back now and understand what I felt at the time. As I was preparing to head into this powerful initiation portal, the part of me that felt afraid was the part of me that has been dying since that trip—the part of me that was burned to ash in my rage, dissolved in a pool of grief and slashed by the sharp blade of betrayal. That part has ultimately surrendered to catharsis.

Friend, have you ever experienced a Soul Calling that simultaneously thrilled and terrified you? Have you felt the raw power and potential that awaits you, but known that it comes at the cost of the life you used to lead? Have you known that, as you were choosing your own liberation, you were also choosing your own death?

I spent more time on the Tor than pretty much anywhere else in Avalon. Here I am after another sunrise practice. I also watched a couple of sunsets, went up a handful of times during the day, and twice after sunset to look at the stars.

I also spent a lot of time in the Chalice Well Gardens. This is the Chalice Well itself, which is connected to the Red Spring (one of the sacred springs of Avalon). I did several mornings of qi gong practice by the Lion's Head fountain in the gardens.

This is exactly the nature of the fear that I felt leading up to my trip. I knew without a shadow of a doubt that my pilgrimage to Avalon was rooted in pure soul calling and resonance, but that by taking the trip, I would have to finally let go of one of the most significant aspects of my life. I knew that the initiations I received on this journey would offer me more power and freedom than I could consciously understand, but that I would also be choosing the death of my old self.

Friend, it has been a bumpy ride. This particular death cycle has primarily taken the form of an incredibly challenging breakup. The exact details aren’t important for this story, but suffice it to say that I have been witnessing with dumbfounded amazement the perfect shitstorm that is continuing to unfold even as we speak. Every time I think the situation has bottomed out, the bottom drops again.

It. Fucking. Sucks.

…but in addition to the massive suck-age and heartache, I am also present to the cosmic perfection of it all. My former partner and I were together for two years, despite knowing that we weren’t each other’s people. We figured out very early on in our relationship that we wanted different things and had different visions for our lives, but decided to journey together anyway out of our mutual love and appreciation, and the growth that was available to us even as not-forever-partners. We each became the go-to person for the other. We built a life together that was rich, beautiful and fun. We were in love, and it was good.
But it wasn’t right, and we both knew it. In fact, we both knew it for more than a year before we finally separated in September.

Looking back now, I can easily see that the fear I felt before going to Avalon came from the part of me that knew it would not survive the journey. The version of me in the not-right partnership, the life I had built with someone I loved and was unwilling to leave: that was the part that felt afraid and resistant. That part of me knew that the initiations I would receive on the pilgrimage would shift me out of alignment with staying in that relationship. I knew that going to Avalon and walking through that portal would mean the end of that chapter of my life.

And just three short weeks after arriving back from Avalon, it all came crashing down in a non-negotiable, can’t-possibly-ignore, what-the-fuck-is-happening, shitstorm that I have been processing and integrating since the beginning of September.

Even though the aftermath of my Avalon trip looks for all intents and purposes like total destruction, entering that initiation portal was one of the most powerful choices I have ever made, and I have no regrets. Even though it has meant the death of my relationship (along with many other connected parts of my identity and life structure) and the continued processing of uncomfortable feelings and shitty circumstances, I am glad I chose that path. Remember the rage, grief, betrayal and catharsis I mentioned earlier? Even though these energies have challenged me to my core, they have been vitally important to the process, because they gave me the perfect fodder to alchemize into true power and resilience. I am blowing my own mind every day with who I am becoming and what I am capable of.

My group had private access to Stonehenge on the last day of the pilgrimage.

Just as I’m experiencing the 3D “whiplash” in response to massive energetic expansion, this Soul Calling has also paved the way for massive growth in other areas. My energetic mastery, psychic perception and attunement to the subtle levels is off the charts. Aside from the relationship blowup, my return from Avalon has included many creative and fruitful projects. I have also begun to refine my work with Dragons and work with higher-vibration practices. My physical body feels more healthy and vital, my community connections are flourishing and I have been invited to share my work in new and exciting places.

I have shared very little about my Avalon trip (it’s obviously still landing and integrating), but it felt important to share with you about the ripple effects of an activation experience. (Side note: did you catch the episode of Shaman Sister Sessions that went out two weeks ago? It was about Soul Activations, and it is directly related to our topic for today. Check it out here.) In particular, I wanted to share this with you because I know I’m not alone when it comes to feeling fear around a soul calling.

Friend, I bet you can relate. Maybe you’ve had an experience like mine, where you feel the power and potential leading up to an initiation experience, knowing that part of you will die in the process, but you choose it anyway. Or maybe you have felt the power and potential emanating from a soul calling, but you haven’t answered it because the cost seems too great. Maybe you’re afraid to let that part of yourself die, so you have yet to step through the initiation portal that awaits you.

I am here to tell you that you will be okay. I promise. It might not seem like it, and believe me, I’ve heard all the objections. Their Soul Calling will lead them to this lineage and body of knowledge, but when it comes time to commit to their journey, their hidden fears come up. When we dig deeper and finally get to the root of it, they say things like, “I’m afraid my marriage won’t survive,” or, “I’m afraid I’ll lose my friends and family because they won’t understand me,” or, “I’m afraid I won’t be able to keep putting up with what I have been tolerating,” or, “I’m afraid because I don’t know who I’ll be if I say yes to that level of growth.” Essentially, all of these people fear the same thing: the death of their old Self.

What about you? What Soul Calling is inviting you to step through a powerful initiation portal, and at what cost? What liberation, power and potential awaits you as you surrender your past self to death?

Are you willing to let yourself die in order to grow and be reborn? Are you willing to shift out of alignment with everything that doesn’t serve you anymore, so you can create more of what does?

It may not be comfortable, but I promise, it’s worth it.

And if your Soul Calling is asking you to step into the initiation portal of Embody Wild, I invite you to answer the call. What growth, expansion and rebirth waits for you on the other side?

If you're ready to see what Embody Wild holds for you, begin the process by submitting your application here.

Your Soul Calling is waiting for you. What do you need to do to answer it?

Many blessings,

Inspiration

While at Stonehenge, I had several visions, past life memories and revisited soul agreements. This was one of the places where I passed through a major initiation portal.

Can you see the double rainbow? I took this picture on my last evening in Avalon after a torrential rainstorm. I climbed Wearyall hill to get a look at the Tor and was treated to this powerful sight.

When I was sick on retreat, and it was the best thing that could have happened.

I AM Alchemy retreat #3 took place October 31-November 3, right during the peak of a nasty cold that left me feeling drained and hoarse. As I left for retreat on Thursday, I felt some anxiety about how I was going to be able to deliver a powerful, transformational experience and show up fully for my students. But looking back, me being sick was the best possible thing that could have happened.

Because I was sick on retreat, a different type of magic happened that otherwise would not have taken place. I was literally forced by my body into a place of more rest, more listening and allowing space for magic to happen, rather than making magic happen. Because I was sick on retreat, I got to learn more about the lineage of I AM Alchemy, and how it wants to move through the world. Keep reading on for a look at the big change coming to I AM Alchemy 2020!

But first, the most awesome thing that took place because I was sick was that my students stepped up to share their mastery.

In addition to this year’s cohort, we were joined by two I AM Alchemy Apprentices from last year who chose to attend this retreat to further their own knowledge and practice. I asked them both to teach a unit during the retreat according to their personal investigation, and they ran with it! We agreed on the topic and they did the rest. The result was a deep-dive journey into the different facets of Scorpio medicine (taught in a way I hadn’t thought of, but immediately loved), and a collective ceremony oriented around harmonic planetary frequencies, with music, mantra and healing calibrated specifically to the planetary constitutions of the students. If you’re not sure what all of that means, just know that it was all amazing and totally revolutionary. Talk about being blown away.

As a result of my apprentice students stepping up in such a big way (combined with my heightened sensitivity of listening and allowing), I felt the lineage of this course asking for things to be a bit different for 2020. Over this past week, I’ve been in a deep dive of meditation, asking questions, checking in with my (human and spirit) mentors and dreamstorming the vision of how this work wants to evolve. Care to check out some of the ways in which I AM Alchemy is growing up?

Here are some of the biggest changes coming to I AM Alchemy:

• Instead of only having one option for students to engage with I AM Alchemy, incoming students now have the choice between two tracks: Auditing or Apprenticeship.

  • The Auditing path is ideal for those who are interested in learning powerful tools for their own process, but may not want (or have time for) the deep-dive experience. Auditing students may or may not be practitioners.

  • The Apprentice path is ideal for those who are all-in on their journey and want deep support, and/or those who wish to add Alchemy to their practitioner skills. Apprentices take this course for certification.

• Retreats are no longer included in the tuition, but students in both tracks may attend the retreats by paying for their own lodging and other costs. Retreat attendance is required for Apprentices to receive certification. Auditing students may attend as many or as few of the retreats as they like.

• Auditing students receive full access to live online classes, community and virtual materials.

• Apprentices also receive monthly one-on-one sessions with me, practicum sessions, peer mentorship and additional training.

Want to see what’s included in each track? Check out all the details here.

The main motivation behind this shift was to create an opportunity for you to engage with I AM Alchemy in the way that is best for YOU. All of my students so far have been all-in, but this style of training isn't compatible with someone who simply doesn't have the time to go deep. This way, I still get to support my Apprentice students on their path of in-depth study and mastery. And instead of turning people away who aren't ready for a big commitment, you now have the option to audit the course and participate in the group without the bigger investment of time, energy and money.

And of course, if you want to go all-in, that's still an option! Apprentices, get ready to go deep into your process of personal Alchemy.

I hope you're as excited as I am! Stay tuned for more about what this means for you, how you know which track is right for your journey, and your next steps for studying this lineage.

Applications are open for I AM Alchemy Want to apply right away? I AM Alchemy 2020

Many blessings,

Inspiration

I'm coming out!

I had a very powerful conversation with a friend of mine. This was no "ordinary" powerful conversation--I went into this conversation with my heart pounding, tears in my eyes and sincerely hoping that I wasn't about to burn a bridge with someone for whom I have a lot of love and respect.

During this conversation, we got really vulnerable. I mean we both dug deeeeep into our hearts to share some tender truths and acknowledge the impact that we've had on each other's lives and processes.

I said something to my friend that struck me as pretty important, and something that I wanted to repeat to you. I told my friend:
 

"I know that, by people being in my sphere, they are challenged and they are changed. I know that, because that's what I am here to do: I am here to help people change, regardless of how that happens."

By people being in my sphere, in my energy field, in my life, they are challenged and they are changed.

I don't think I've ever really articulated it in that way before, but it's true. When people come into my life in an energetically intimate way (as a friend, as a partner, as a client, etc), being around me challenges them and invites them to step into their own transformation.

Why am I sharing that with you?

Because you're in my sphere.

… if you are ready to be challenged, if you want to be prompted, invited and supported to transform in ways you never imagined, if you are ready to step into your own magnificent unfolding... stick around. Maybe even come a little closer.

And let me "come out" and reintroduce myself:
 

Hi, I'm Michelle Hawk.

I'm a Shamanic Alchemist who will help you
Master Your Craft by Mastering Your Self.

If you like hanging out in my energy field, thank you for being here. I'm glad to know that you're ready to be challenged.

In fact, I have a few ways that you can lean into that a little more, if you like!

By the way, that conversation with my friend went great. Yes, I was apprehensive to broach an uncomfortable topic, but I'm so glad I did. The juicy breakthroughs always come after we push our edges. My friend and I closed with a lot of gratitude and respect for each other, and deep acknowledgement of the transformative nature of our connection.

What transformation are you ready for?

Many blessings,

Are you ready to go from being "just another healer" to a Fully Empowered Master of Transformation?

Apply now for I AM Alchemy 2020!
>>>http://joyofenergy.com/i-am-alchemy



Journal/meditation prompts:
 

What transformation am I ready for at this time? What in my life is asking to be changed? How can I gracefully align with those changes?

7 Keys for Mastering Your Craft

What does it mean to Master Your Craft?

How do you know when you have?

Whether or not you're currently a practitioner (healer, bodyworker, yoga teacher, coach, naturopath, etc), we all have a craft. And I know, since you're here, that you have a vision for what is possible by mastering your craft.

One of the biggest fallacies I have seen over and over in my practice (and one that I have been guilty of, myself) is one that continues to plague the Spiritual and self-development community. And it drives me effing bonkers.

Maybe you know someone like this. Maybe you've been in this position, too! Either way, I share this with you because I believe it's one of the most fundamental components for any practitioner. The fallacy is this: many people try to master their craft without the internal process of mastering themselves.

I've shared articles with you before about the path of Self Mastery and its implications on our personal and professional lives. In fact, I designed a year-long intensive training course that helps empowered practitioners master their Craft by mastering themSelves. If you want to trust yourself as a practitioner, feel confident in your intuitive gifts and your service, build a thriving practice that supports your life and create the biggest possible impact for your clients and for the world...

Turn your energies inward.

Come home to yourself.

Master your craft by mastering your Self.
 

How do we do this, exactly? What do Masterful Practitioners have in common?

Funny you should ask! I wrote a guide for you that answers that very question:
7 Keys for Mastering Your Craft. (Don't let the name fool you--it's all about Self-Mastery.) This guide offers 7 things that all Masterful Practitioners incorporate into their practice, as well as journal and meditation prompts for you so you can incorporate them into your own practice!

Scroll down for the guide. Happy integration!

Many blessings,

7 Keys for Mastering Your Craft

Strong and Consistent Personal Practice

In order for them to be effective and powerful in their work, masterful practitioners know that they must cultivate health and vitality in all areas of their life: physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. Personal practice serves as a microcosm for the rest of our lives, and masterful practitioners prioritize their personal practice so they can successfully support their own energies as well as their clients.

Journal/meditation prompt: What do I do every day that supports my health and vitality? What specifically does this practice do for my body, my mind, my heart and my spirit? What fills me up the most?
 

Radical Self Awareness and Continual Inquiry

Masterful practitioners know themselves from the inside out, and they know that there is no “arrival.” We are never “done” our process of actualization and development—the best way to support our clients and be effective changemakers in the world is to remain in close contact with our own process so we can ensure that we’re showing up authentically, fully and clearly.

Journal/meditation prompt: Tune in with the subtleties of your body and your energy field. What do you notice? Are there any hidden, trapped emotions or beliefs that show up? How can you create space to get to “know yourself” and who you are becoming every day?
 

Self-Trust

This is different from blind faith or confidence: masterful practitioners trust themselves because they know themselves well (see previous point) and have lived experience of their own capability, capacity and resourcefulness. Even if the circumstance is new, masterful practitioners trust themselves to call upon their reservoirs of self-awareness and life experience to effectively navigate the situation.

Journal/meditation prompt: State the affirmation, “I trust myself completely.” As you do so, notice what sensations or emotions arise for you. Ask yourself, in what ways do I trust myself? In what ways do I not trust myself? How do I relate to self-trust? How do I want to embody self-trust?
 

Congruence

The way we do something is the way we do everything. Masterful practitioners embody congruence, meaning that all areas of their life and practice exhibit consistent traits and principles. A non-congruent practitioner might teach nutrition and self-care, but go home every night to binge on sugar and television. A congruent practitioner fully embodies and aligns with their practice in all areas.

Journal/meditation prompt: How am I embodying and aligning with my practice every day? In what areas am I congruent? In what areas am I incongruent? What action steps do I need to take in order to come into congruent alignment?
 

Practice is Fully Grounded and Integrated

Masterful practitioners have a seemingly effortless relationship with their practice. Their work seems to flow through and from them, as an extension of their very being. This “effortlessness” actually comes from having processed and integrated their work so deeply that every cell, every facet of consciousness and every action aligns with their practice. This energy and wisdom live fully in their body, and they draw upon it without having to think about it.

Journal/meditation prompt: How have I integrated and grounded my work? To what extent is my practice fully embodied? What remains to be integrated? What steps do I need to take to ground in my work?
 

Less Is More

Have you ever been around a practitioner who simply seems to help you feel brighter by their mere presence? The energies are subtle, words are few and precise, but incredibly effective. Masterful practitioners know that less is more: they do less and have more impact. By filling a session with doing, there is less room for being. Masterful practitioners know that true healing and growth
happens in the spaces between doing, and create plenty of room for being.

Journal/meditation prompt: What is my relationship to doing? What is my relationship to being? How can I do less in order to be more effective and have more impact?
 

Healthy Relationship with Shadow

All Lightworkers must have a healthy, grounded relationship with Shadow as a sacred ally. Masterful practitioners know that “negative” emotions and energies are neither good nor bad, but merely represent one polarity of the spectrum. Instead of demonizing the Shadow, masterful practitioners welcome it as a valued teacher. They have an active working partnership with Death and the Sacred Destroyer, and know that Shadow may also work in service to love.

Journal/meditation prompt: What is my relationship to Shadow? What does this say about me? How do I want to relate to Shadow? How is Shadow an ally in my life and practice?

Are you ready to go from being "just another healer" to a fully empowered Master of Transformation?
>>>Apply now for I AM Alchemy 2020!

Freedom Through Commitment

What are your commitments?

What a beautiful weekend! My students and I just finished three days of deep-dive magic and practice at our third I AM Alchemy retreat.

...and I feel so much clarity.

This course is one of the most aligned, authentic components of my business to date. Within the framework of I AM Alchemy, there are teachings, structures and syllabus. But one of the things I love most about teaching a body of knowledge based in practical, real-time magic is the freedom.

Read on for one of the highlight takeaways from the weekend! You can apply this tool to uplevel and receive clarity in your own practice!

General applications for I AM Alchemy 2019 are now open. Whether you are an existing or aspiring practitioner, healer or coach, or whether you want to spend 12 months walking the Alchemist path as part of your personal journey of commitment to Self, Spirit and your practice... if you want to bring practical application of real-time magic and alignment with Universal forces of creation to your life, I AM Alchemy is for you. Apply here: I AM Alchemy

I admit that part of me was a tad apprehensive last year at the idea of offering a year-long course, especially at the idea of being tied to a syllabus. One of the things I value most in my business is the flexibility I have to offer what feels most lit-up, and sometimes that can change from year to year, or season to season.

But the thing about this course is, it is a life force of its own, and as such, it has a process of evolution and growth within the body of knowledge itself. I AM Alchemy is not a dry, scripted teaching from a dusty book. It is a vital, living entity that has its own energy flow and plan. Someone asked me recently how I organize and offer my teachings, and the most honest response was simply, "I listen to what wants to be shared."

This is the difference between teaching and stewardship. Yes, I have a plan. Yes, I have a course outline and documents and structure. But more important than this is the capacity to listen and to transmit what wants to come through, and knowing that it will be exactly the right thing for my students.

Ultimately, my role in this process is to simply pass along the messages. As a steward of this mystery school, part of my job is to be quiet and allow myself to be guided, so that I can guide my students in turn. This is my commitment to Spirit and to Alchemy itself, and as long as I practice this work, I honor this commitment. As long as I honor this commitment, I have the freedom I desire in my practice.

My commitments to this body of knowledge allow me to be an active participant in the mystery, which always feels like the most lit-up path.

In preparation for the retreat, I asked my students to write their own commitments. This practice is our way of making a contract of sorts with ourselves and with the work. We witnessed each other in our commitments during ceremony, and the power that came from this practice blew myself and everyone away.

What happens when we make these commitments? What happens when we spell out in writing what we are signing up for as a Lightworker on this planet?

What are your commitments?

Here some of are mine. Check out below for the prompts I offered my students if you would like to write your own.

As an Alchemist, I commit...

As an Alchemist, I commit to holding myself in trust and compassion through change as I discover and know fully all parts of my Self. I commit to bringing magic to every facet of my life.

As an Alchemist, I commit to bringing more subtlety, intentionality, precision and grace to my work. I commit to redefining my personal practice to align more supportively and harmoniously with my well-being.

As an Alchemist, I commit to carrying out the operations of the Sun, Moon and Earth here on this planet for the Highest and Greatest Good of all beings.

As an Alchemist, I commit to being an instrument and steward of this body of knowledge, to ensuring its path in the modern world, and to honoring and participating in this cycle, always. I commit to holding the torch so that those who are ready may find the path. I commit to listening always to this work, and offering teachings in alignment with the instruction I receive.

If you are ready to step into your own commitments to the path, then I AM Alchemy is right for you. If you are ready to answer your deep soul calling to live your purpose... If you are ready to step into fulfillment of your Soul Contract and commitments... If you are ready to remember who you truly are, claim your I AM and inspire others to do the same... If you are ready to walk the Earth as a Divine Embodied Being...

Applications are now open! Apply here: I AM Alchemy

Many blessings,

Journal prompt:

What are my commitments to my Self?
What are my commitments to my practice?
What are my commitments to Spirit?
What do I need in order to honor those commitments?

New Moon in Capricorn: Sacred Structure

The New Moon in Capricorn next Tuesday brings us the powerful medicine of Sacred Structure.

Without our bones, it doesn't matter how much muscle or energy or force of will we have: we would not be able to move an inch.

The same is true of anything in our lives: without structure to support and hold a container, action becomes impossible. We spend so much time and energy focused on inspiration, movement, fire and momentum... but running around the world fueled by pure spirit is completely unsustainable. If we're hoping to build mountains, we need to root in the bedrock.

And I'm building mountains. Are you?

If so, we must focus on the foundations of our lives. What sacred structures can we build for ourselves to be able to grow? How can we strengthen the "bones" of our lives to give stability and sustainability to our actions? How can we make our work and our presence in the world more lasting, more meaningful and more powerful?

Let's build our bones together.

Do I Trust Myself?

I had the most beautiful session yesterday with a client whom I have known for many years. We delved into some deep soul contract work (the subject of December's master class, in case you missed it! See below). As a part of this journey into her soul contract, we examined the idea of who we are in terms of trust.

How do we relate to the idea of trust and truth? How do we trust ourselves? How does that inform our identity, our I AM? In turn, how does that affect the way we live and the choices we make?

It can be easy to trust ourselves when things are going well. But the true test of our ability to ground in and fully surrender to radical self-trust comes when it feels like we have no idea what the heck we're doing. In those moments, we have the opportunity to pause, remember who we truly are, and say, "Yes!" to ourselves and our innate wisdom.

As I reflect on some of my major life events of 2017, I see plenty of places where I was able to drop into deep self-trust.

...and I also see some areas where it took me longer than I would have liked to get to that place, or where I didn't trust myself and my innate wisdom because I wanted something else to happen. In these moments, I ended up wishing I had just listened to that whisper at the core of my being that always tells me the truth.

All of these moments are important. I have learned just as much (more, actually) from those times of hesitancy and resistance as I have from my "easy" wins. As long as we can do so without punishing ourselves or spiraling into guilt, shame or blame, reviewing those times when we didn't fully trust ourselves can provide a tremendous opportunity to alter our patterns of behavior.

The more we can surrender into radical trust of our truest nature, the freer we will be to put it into action and show up the way we want to in the world. Here's to a 2018 full of opportunities to trust ourselves even more!

Journal Prompts:

As we head into the final days of 2017, I invite you to examine your relationship with trust--particularly how you trust yourself (or not):

When is it easy for me to trust myself?
When do I find it challenging?
What are the differences in those circumstances?
What does it take for me to bridge the gap?

One Client's Amazing Healing

I love witnessing my clients as they make amazing shifts in all areas of their lives! I checked in with one client today who, before we started working together, was feeling stuck—stuck in an unfulfilling job, stuck with friends and acquaintances with whom she no longer had anything in common, stuck in a place of less-than-optimum health and stuck in a mundane daily routine that zapped her of any drive and energy. She contacted me several months ago after she came across a book on Shamanism, and she described the feeling as though a fire was lit inside of her. She knew that her health, her marriage and her life force energy were all suffering and she needed help to “get unstuck” and reconnect with her joy and sense of purpose.

Even though she was motivated to make some changes in her life, she was very afraid of upsetting the status quo (especially in her work and in her marriage). What if these life changes made her stick out even more at work and she lost her job? What if, by stepping into her personal power, she alienated her husband? What if she lost everything?

A few weeks ago, we completed our three months of working together in my Deep Medicine Path program, and watching her transformation has been absolutely extraordinary. Instead of losing her job, she decided to proactively phase herself out of her unfulfilling line of work at her own, gentle pace. She is in the process of beginning her own life coaching practice so she can inspire and empower others. Instead of losing her marriage and feeling alienated from her husband, their relationship finally has that spark of new life! He has loved witnessing her changes and gladly stepped up in full support of her transformation. Instead of feeling drained and tired all the time, she now has energy to devote to her own health and well-being and her body “hasn’t felt this good in years!”

Hearing “I’m so glad I worked up the courage to say yes and work with you!” from a client is the most amazing feeling. I am so humbled every time someone trusts me to shepherd them through their awakening. It means the world to me that I get to be a mentor and a guide for those stepping into their own power and embodying the radiance of their true selves. In so much gratitude!